Day 26, November 28, 2011

Dina:

I sent Kelly a text the other day. It read: “my jeans and my wedding ring are loose”. But…they could be looser or falling off after 26 days. Right? Right.

TRX is really, REALLY an amazing workout. I enjoyed it, felt like I gave everything I had. The suspension/strap/trusting yourself piece of the workout is definitely a challenge but I feel as if TRX is something I will love to participate for quite a long time!

Swimming today was replaced with an unexpectedly long doctor appointment. Tests, poking, prodding, more tests…with some definitive answers on Friday. I mention this only to refer back to the point of over-scheduling activity for myself. I missed swimming today but I am okay with that as I have 3 more scheduled appointments with exercise that I cannot miss. Cannot. Will Not. Doctor appointment = excuse? Maybe. Possibly. Definitely. But you will not hear of another one for the next 54 days. Period.

Kelly’s last post moved me in a lot of ways. Outside of the trainer/trainee relationship, I feel like we have a very solid friendship and we have bonded in many ways. We have a lot of laughs, we share some of the same struggles and I am so grateful for that bond. It allows us to be real and honest and that is why I was so moved by her last blog entry. It takes a lot to muster up the chutzpah to freely and openly talk about yourself to an unknown, public audience and Kelly rocked it! To me, it was inspirational. And…it didn’t take a genius to hear what Coach Kel was saying directly to me. Tomorrow is coming and I intend to kick its ass! (And I know Kelly can visualize me saying that in the dramatic, animated way that is me.)

Which brings me to another point. There is a definite disconnect for the majority of people, between their heart, their brain, AND their body. For me, my brain knows what I have to do and when I have to do it. But there is a disconnect (which is getting “smaller”) between what I know and what I urge my physical body to do. And my heart? Well, my heart has a “magic pill” vision of me unzipping my “fat suit” and instantly becoming who I feel like I am on the inside.  So how do I get all three in sync? How do I get my body to listen to my brain? And how do I get my heart to see a more realistic vision? And once I get all 3 in sync, where do I go from there? It’s amazing how much psychology is really involved in making a lifestyle change with regard to weight loss and maintenance…

I have a date with the gym tomorrow…

"Nothing to it but to Do it!"

Kelly:

Ok, “fat suit”.  I’m busting at the seams!  It’s all perception.  Perception was brought up in one of my Kettle Bell classes today and WOW!  Perception is an amazing thing.  Think about that word, how it’s spelled, each syllable, what it means to you, to others, how do you perceive the word perception?

Mr. Webster:

per·cep·tion

   /pərˈsɛpʃən/ Show Spelled[per-sep-shuhn]

noun

1.

the act or faculty of apprehending by means of the senses or of the mind; cognition; understanding.

2.

immediate or intuitive recognition or appreciation, as of moral, psychological, or aesthetic qualities; insight; intuition; discernment: an artist of rare perception.

3.

the result or product of perceiving, as distinguished from the act of perceiving; percept.

4.

Psychology . a single unified awareness derived from sensory processes while a stimulus is present.

5.

Law . the taking into possession of rents, crops, profits, etc

I’ll focus on #4 above.  Is it really an awareness or appreciation?  Sometimes it’s an unawareness .....

Dina, ask yourself in the mirror out loud- “what is my real perception of myself?”  “Do I really feel like I have a ‘fat suit’ on?”  Is Dina’s fat suit a how she really sees herself and will 26 MORE days change that perception, IF, in fact it’s perception and not how she truly sees herself?  Maybe “fat suit” is how she THINKS people perceive her.  If it’s the real way Dina sees herself, how does she change that and where is the beginning of accepting herself for who she is?   If it’s the latter of the two, this is a defense system. 

Dina, don’t you talk to yourself in the mirror?  Ya, you do!!!! :)  Do it again.  Remember how unique and amazing YOU ARE.  Tell yourself your heart really knows, listen to it and carry on with your day.  Start to pull your perception(s) and subconscious to the conscious, it will make this much easier.

Dina, I couldn’t have ever said it better myself….”my heart has the magic pill”…"becoming who I feel like I am on the inside”.

Listening to your heart, easy.  Listening to your brain, easy.  Listening to your body, easy.  Listening to your perception of yourself, extremely difficult.  Your perception is part of your subconscious.  I recently heard a very intelligent woman talk about subconscious and referred to it as your “inner child”.  I have to agree to some extent!  Listening to an inner child, extremely difficult.  Children are not sure what they want!

P.S. 64 days (and I’m not sure Dina really talks to herself in the mirror!)

"If You Can Change Your Mind You CAN Change Your Body"

Kelly LaCasse

Fitsique Body & Mind

www.fitsiquebodyandmind.net

kellylacasse@verizon.net

Dina Wiroll                                                

Feed Your Soul                                        

www.feedyoursoulnow.com                         

dina@feedyoursoulnow.com

Day 23, November 25, 2011

Dina:

Thanksgiving.

A gluttonous holiday by nature. In my family, it’s not just your typical turkey and dressing. We do it up. Lasagna. Roast beef. Ham. Stuffed shells. Apple pie. Pumpkin pie. Stuffing. Stuffed mushrooms. A buffet of wonderfully delicious, homemade food with no one eyeballing you when you go for seconds.

Other than a slice of apple pie (which, I might add, was heavenly), I managed to stay within my portion sizes and loaded my plate with veggies. Did I count calories and nutrients on Thanksgiving? Nope. I should have but I decided that I would just keep a watchful eye on myself and not over do it. And it worked. Well, with the exception of the apple pie.

The scale. Sigh…I have such high hopes for the number on that scale that I am almost afraid to get on it. However, I know it is not the right time. With vacation last week and the holiday this week, my exercise routine has suffered. Not an excuse by any means as I did do quite a bit of walking, but I need to kick it up. Next week I start TRX with Kelly…I am very much looking forward to challenging myself and having Kelly challenge me at the same time. Swimming starts next week too. I found an aquatics partner and I am also going to do some lap swimming on my own. Being in the water is like second nature to me…there is nothing quite like it. And yoga…for my body and my brain.

Nutritionally, I am still running at 1300-1350 calories a day, with a nutrient mix of 55% carbs, 24% protein, 21% fat. I am using the Lose It! app on my iPhone to keep track of everything I eat and my exercise. The more friends, the better so if you use Lose It! Too, so friend me at dina@feedyoursoulnow.com.  

My exercise schedule, barring sick children, is to do TRX with Kelly on Mondays, swim Tuesdays, gym (ARC trainer/elliptical) Wednesdays, Aquatics on Thursdays and yoga on Friday to settle myself down. Too much? Probably, but if I miss something due to unforeseen circumstances, I am still getting a good deal of activity in.

"Nothing to it but to Do it!"

Kelly:

Uh-ha.  So did anyone else read between the lines in Dina’s post?  I see a fine line of “teeter-totter”, anyone else?  Go back to day 11, read that again, then read this one.  You’ll see: positive, negative, justification reasoning and so on.  Dina’s human!  But Dina will have to face the inevitable body measuring tape, a readjustment of calories and a more SWEAT.  A client posted on Facebook “sweat is fat crying” – you can read into that however you like, I happen to feel it’s a fantastic saying.

Dina dear, the inevitable is coming….I cannot and will not keep you on 1300-1350 calories for more than 2 more weeks.  I’ll give you the 2 weeks to get consistent with your workouts then a TOTAL RE-ADJUSTMENT is coming.  The only reason Dina’s carbs are @ 55% now is because consistent workouts were supposed to start 22 days ago.  Life happens, but isn’t that why we are blogging, so we can help others get out of the “coulda, shoulda, woulda”?   We move onward and upward ‘round these parts….The carbs are at 55% for your fuel to help you through workouts.   I know you are walking, but again, I think you are saying this is obviously not enough.

I have cut Dina’s calories to an amount where she “shoulda, woulda, coulda” lost a few (or more) pounds…that’s Dina’s goal, that’s my goal.  However, until she begins to get her workouts and eating (at the same time) consistent, she’s loosing these lbs based only on caloric deficit.  Not 100% the correct way to reach the goal she’s looking for.  I am not Weight Watchers or any other the “other” weight loss program.  I coach both sides of the lifestyle.  Both sides need to start happening, now and consistently.

I am looking forward to catching up with Dina later this week to find out about her exercise regimen and how it’s going.  I can see why Dina overcompensated in her daily regimen, I like that.  Why not have a “just in case” day.  At first glance, I thought it was too much, coming out with guns blazing so to speak. Be flexible within reason with yourself.  I also like that Dina has mentioned those beautiful words: “I feel different” again.  Still realize – TIME IS TICKING.  Quickly.  After 22 days, where is your patience, where is mine? 

By the way, I’m friends with Dina on Lose It! and I track myself as well, it’s nice to know how your day is going, nutritionally.  If you don’t have it planned out, how do you know what you are supposed to do? GUESS?  Guess not my friends, guess not.  Plan ahead, if not 7 days, try 1, try 2.  No one is asking you to kill yourself over planning your health and nutrition.  It just might kill you if you don’t.  Who cares if to start you have to eat the same thing 2 days in a row? I plan, Dina plans, and we do this for a living!  Do you really think you can keep guessing?  So back to “other” weight loss programs: Not me, I am preventative guidance.  If you do this right now, you don’t have to do it later.  Need a plan, need to know what to do next, need to understand how to eat for your body and goals?  See me.

A side note about my challenge when I hired my personal trainer:  I thought because I was working out 3 times a week and cutting back here and there, I was golden!  Well, after realizing  “x” amount of days had gone by (UMMM…wasting money, literally) and the goal and vision for myself wasn’t happening I realized what a LIFESTYLE CHANGE really meant.  This cliché is TRUE, whether or not you want to believe it and until you do, well….…..

Here’s my point - the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas was when I lost the bulk of my weight  and began to see muscle definition consistently, and dammit, I was getting weighed in Every! Single! Week!  You know why I wasn’t opposed to it?  I wasn’t afraid of the scale, I knew my head was in the game, I knew that damn Random Number Generator(the scale) was going to tell me that I was giving myself results – I. Was. Not. Surprised.  Oh, and then a month later I was on vacation in Mexico, All Inclusive Resort (AKA – eat yourself silly) with my parents (mom’s an alcoholic and my best friend so I was always with her, dad’s a burger/fry guy) and my husband who has never thought about what he eat (eats what I give him-thankfully) and still came home to the same weight as when I left AND wasn’t allowed to miss a weigh in upon return.

Please understand, this is a very tough time of year for me, brings back LOTS of memories – good memories, but it reminds me of where I came from.  The hard work, the motivation I had to dig up inside of myself, the frustration of the before, the frustration of learning it all, the frustration of having to put one foot in front of the other and making these changes for ME!

 Not many people know this part of my story, I may, stress MAY have shared it with one or two people, and if I have, I don’t remember who I told.  So there, there it is…there’s my story world!   I actually feel relieved that I shared that!

To be honest, I turn a deaf ear to the excuses, nod my head and just agree with people when they justify their weight issues/gain, etc over the holidays.  Isn’t that really what “you” want anyway?  Really?  Think about it.   If you didn’t want a nod and someone to just agree with you, you’d never bring it up in the first place because you wouldn’t need to justify or declare your emotions about it.  When you realize this change in yourself, you’ll know it, just like you KNOW anything else.

Will tomorrow ever come?  Another dear friend of mine has a tattoo “Tomorrow is Never Promised”

"If You Can Change Your Mind You CAN Change Your Body"

Kelly LaCasse

Fitsique Body & Mind

www.fitsiquebodyandmind.net

kellylacasse@verizon.net

Dina Wiroll                                                

Feed Your Soul                                        

www.feedyoursoulnow.com                         

dina@feedyoursoulnow.com 

Days 11-16 November 13-18, 2011

Dina:

Vacation.

5 days at the happiest place on earth. And for all but one meal (and maybe one snack), I stayed extremely close to my nutrient and calorie targets every day. We walked on average of about 4 hours a day (not a fast walk, but walking nonetheless), drank gallons of water, snacked on fruit and protein bars and resisted temptation. Except for my birthday. I indulged in a glass of Malbec, and beef tenderloin with mashed potatoes BUT I asked for extra vegetables. It was a delicious meal that I enjoyed slowly and thoughtfully. When birthday dessert showed up (a little sampler plate of chocolate mousse, cheesecake and some kind of chocolate cake) I took one bite of the cheesecake and the mousse and passed the rest along.  I feel proud of my choices and happy that I did not fall into the “it’s vacation, so I can stuff my face” trap that happens to most of us. I also appreciated that I allowed myself to indulge a little because denying yourself sets you up for failure.

I just want to point out 2 things.

1. It was WORK to think about my meals and to plan accordingly in a place that had every type of food under the sun. So unless you are COMMITED to the work, you will not see the results. Even on vacation.

2. I am a people watcher. I do a lot of “comparison shopping”. For example, I will think to myself “I want her arms” or “I wish my legs were that thin”. It’s not a fun game AT ALL. It’s exhausting. I worried that the pictures I was in would make me look big. I hid behind my kids. I wore loose clothing. I spent WAY TOO MUCH TIME worrying about my “look” and the looks of others. Around our third day, I realized how silly this behavior is. I am who I am. I walk around in the body that I have because of the choices I made. And I have made a commitment to myself to make that body better. As soon as I had that "moment", I started to enjoy myself a lot more. I am pointing this out because it hurt me to realize I lost time and memories because I was focused on something that I could not IMMEDIATELY fix. The fix is coming…but I have to do the WORK. I will never get those memories back…but I can make a conscious decision to not miss any future memories…

"Nothing to it but to Do it!"

Kelly:

Dina has me on task!  Great news! I've got new meals to put together for her, new things to think about and now we might be ready for measurements or the "random number generator"...I'm more curious about measurements.  Dina and I are meeting on Monday...here's what Dina should start thinking about:

Has she noticed any physical changes?

What are they?

What will your thoughts, comments and emotions be if others notice physical changes?  Start gearing up now-don't wait to see what happens with these questions.  (in my opinion)

How will Dina talk about herself when she bumps into someone that hasn't seen her in "x" long?  What do you say? How do you say it?  How will people hear it and do you think these questions even matter?

How does your husband feel about what is going on?

Do your kids understand what you are doing and WHY?

Dina needs to start to clarify her vision of herself, this should become clearer after our conversation on Monday.

I will be re-evaluating Dina's caloric intake as well....may not change much, if at all.  This decision will be based on the next 4 weeks...NOT the days that have gone by.  

LOOK FORWARD.  By looking forward  you are supporting your own goals.

"If You Can Change Your Mind You CAN Change Your Body"

Kelly LaCasse

Fitsique Body & Mind

www.fitsiquebodyandmind.net

kellylacasse@verizon.net

Dina Wiroll                                                

Feed Your Soul                                        

www.feedyoursoulnow.com                         

dina@feedyoursoulnow.com 

Day Seven - November 9, 2011

Dina:

A week in.

Kelly and I met and discussed the nutrition and exercise plan. We agreed that I could continue to make substations on the nutrition piece as long as the substitutions were close matches to the original items.  She is also going to give me some additional dinner options as I am trying to get the family to eat with me so I need to change it up a little or the kids will lose interest. My exercise routine had to change, so now I am doing something different 4 days out of the week – swimming, walking, TRX and Yoga. I can include more walking if I want to, but 4 days a week is a very realistic goal at this point in the game. We agreed to a weigh-in 2 weeks from now to make adjustments to caloric intake based on new exercise routine.

Our discussion got a little (okay…a lot) emotional when we talked about the nocturnal eating situation. I have an internal alarm clock set for 3:00am. We used to do blood sugar checks on my son at this time. At the advice of our Diabetes Nurse Educator, we have stopped those checks as his numbers have been really good. But I omitted a piece of information from our conversation. And I am not sure exactly why I did because I trust Kelly implicitly. Maybe I was afraid of saying it out loud like a self-fulfilling prophecy or I didn’t want to start crying. There is a syndrome where Type 1 children inexplicably have an extreme low blood sugar episode during the night that causes sudden cardiac arrest. There are no signs or symptoms, no warnings or indicators. So my 3am alarm clock??? Checking to see if my son is still breathing…

Again, not sure why I omitted that information. As a future Food Psychology Coach, it is something I would want my client to disclose. We set a goal for sleeping through the night and I was so totally good with it as I probably have not slept a full night in 6 years. But is that realistic knowing what we know now??

"Nothing to it but to Do it!"

Kelly:

As a trainer, I’m realizing more and more that I shouldn’t be surprised that any client withholds information.  Going through a process like this is very, very layered. 

I think that part of the reason why Dina was so emotional is because she thought she may feel very emotional again and didn’t want to do that in front of me “again”.  Now, if you know Dina, can you hear the word “again” the way she would say it?...that puts a spin on the word “a.g.a.i.n.” doesn’t it?  Dina doesn’t like to do anything “again” that is uncomfortable.  She’s realistic.  Does anyone?  Dina thinking she’d be emotional and withholding the information was her subconscious’ safety place.  We all have one…..

 What would have changed if Dina shared her fear, right there, just at that moment in the office at the studio?  Your answer:  ____  My answer:  that’ll come later.  Dina’s answer:…she’ll have to tell us. (see, there really is 3 sides to every story!)

Support systems are people you can and should trust.  Support systems let you cry, cheer, be shy, tell a story AGAIN AND AGAIN.  Support systems help your subconscious speak & emerge.  Dina has allowed me (thank you!) to be part of her support system.  I think next time there is an “again?” or “again!” moment, we will both have, and hopefully everyone reading this blog, learned from this.

Your support system needs to be huge!  Whatever your definition of huge is.  Imagine this:

You’ve been hyping up for something you’ve been doing for the last (X) amount of time.  You’ve put it all out there; it’s your big day!  Let’s call it Your Show.  Just before Your Show starts you peek between the curtains before you come out on stage!  “Geez”, you think, “that can be a big crowd out there, a big scary crowd.”– but this is the exciting part – don’t your really just love thinking of all the support you have waiting to see you for Your Show?  Could you imagine if you peeked between the curtains before Your Show and there was only ONE person sitting there?  &*%$+)!!#, where did your support go?  But you’ve been working on this for (X) amount of time!  Remember, support is here for you if you are receptive to it, if not, then more work needs to be done within yourself.  When you’re ready, so is the crowd.  I truly feel Dina was not afraid to tell me about Death In Bed syndrome, she was afraid of the emotion due to the thought.  Your subconscious is not you, your thoughts are not you, these are all things that are only a small part of you and Your Show. 

This holds true for what you think that big scary crowd would think, would it be what you said or are you more afraid of your emotions and how you felt about Your Show in front of only ONE person.  Would you think “what a WASTE?” or no?  You decide.  Are you ready to show yourself as a successful person no matter what it is?  FEAR OF SUCCESS, OR FEAR OF SUPPORT?

"If You Can Change Your Mind You CAN Change Your Body"

 

Kelly LaCasse

Fitsique Body & Mind

www.fitsiquebodyandmind.net

kellylacasse@verizon.net

Dina Wiroll                                                

Feed Your Soul                                        

www.feedyoursoulnow.com                         

dina@feedyoursoulnow.com